BREAKING NEWS. Google's new CEO, Graf Fürchtegott Siegmund von Lohengries, has outlined his new company-wide policy with respect to social responsibility and social justice. The main focus of the policy is to strengthen community cohesion based on traditional values.
As of January 1, 2019, all male employees of the company are to wear tucked-in shirts and trousers, all female employees - dresses or skirts. Superiors are to be addressed as "Madam" or "Sir" as appropriate, at all times.
Each first Monday of the month is to begin with a company-wide standing prayer in the Christian faith, which all employees must attend, followed by a pledge of allegiance to the American flag and an oath of fealty to the American nation. Observant Jews, Muslims, or Buddhists may obtain a leave from the Christian prayer upon a written petition from their respective religious communities.
All non-native employees, foreigners, and anyone speaking American English with a foreign accent will be put on a 6-month probationary period to assess their acculturation to classical Western values, such as the sacredness of the individual's life and freedoms, the Protestant work ethic, the common law, the separation of powers, and the grounding of morality in a community of religious faith.
Any postings, emails, or chat discussions of political or ideological nature that are in contradiction with these views will result in an HR investigation and possibly firing without recourse.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2018-02-07 01:31 am (UTC)As of January 1, 2019, all male employees of the company are to wear tucked-in shirts and trousers, all female employees - dresses or skirts. Superiors are to be addressed as "Madam" or "Sir" as appropriate, at all times.
Each first Monday of the month is to begin with a company-wide standing prayer in the Christian faith, which all employees must attend, followed by a pledge of allegiance to the American flag and an oath of fealty to the American nation. Observant Jews, Muslims, or Buddhists may obtain a leave from the Christian prayer upon a written petition from their respective religious communities.
All non-native employees, foreigners, and anyone speaking American English with a foreign accent will be put on a 6-month probationary period to assess their acculturation to classical Western values, such as the sacredness of the individual's life and freedoms, the Protestant work ethic, the common law, the separation of powers, and the grounding of morality in a community of religious faith.
Any postings, emails, or chat discussions of political or ideological nature that are in contradiction with these views will result in an HR investigation and possibly firing without recourse.